A Better Day

Today my day got a lot better when my friend Olivia came over and took us to the beach. I needed to get out of the house because Brett has had to take the good car to work the past few days which has left Ryann and I stranded at home every day. But today we went to the park and then the beach for a picnic and swimming with Olivia and her kids (Nolan and Aviana). The kids had a blast and I got some much-needed sun. So my complaint from earlier has been fixed by a visit from a good friend!!

The Irritation of Pregnancy

I have to vent because I am tired of being pregnant and I still have half of my pregnancy left. The past few days I haven't slept more than 3 hours at night, my lower back is killing me, I can no longer lay on my stomach, and I generally feel crappy all day. I know it is noticeable, because this morning Ryann says, "Mommy, you crabby?" And I simply said, "yep". Sad. Hopefully I will feel better soon. I'm sure that once Brett gets the air conditioner set up I will feel better, just cuz it won't be so hot in here all day (and night). So I'm feeling bad that I am already crabby and I still have so much longer to be pregnant! I don't remember feeling this way with Ryann....not until the very end anyways. So that is my complaint of the day.

My Sunburned Child

Today I was not a good mommy! I put sunscreen on Ryann early in the morning, and then she had a bath before lunch, and NO SUNSCREEN after that! I am crazy because the sun was HOT today and she took a bike ride, played soccer, and took 2 walks. Now she is sad, tired and sunburned and watching Spongebob, laying on my bed. How sad is that? At least we all had fun today.....now once the sunburn sets in we'll see how much fun we're having!

5 months pregnant

Here I am only 5 months pregnant with # 2. I am already feeling so big, I can't imagine what the next 4 months will be like! I will be enormous this fall!! YIKES!

Another Girl!

On Monday we found out that we are probably having another girl. I am, of course, very happy to hear that we are having a healthy baby, measuring perfectly and looking beautiful, but I am feeling nervous about having another girl! I was totally feeling like I was having a boy because this pregnancy has been so different from Ryann, and I was getting excited for a boy. It would be fun to see what its like to raise a son after having a daughter. I was also so excited for Brett to have a son, since the baby we lost was a boy, and it would be exciting to see him bond with a son. So when I told Brett all of this, he says he is excited to have another girl. He's excited that the baby looks healthy and well, and he loves Ryann so much that he loves that he will have 2 little girls. He's also glad that Ryann will have a sister to play with. So i felt all bad that I was even struggling with the idea that we are having another girl. I just get my heart set on things so easily that when they don't go the way I expect them to, I am upset about it. But having another girl is exciting. Ryann will have a sister and hopefully they will have tons of fun playing together! Plus, I don't have to go out and buy a bunch of clothes! So we are having another dramatic little girl to keep us busy. Brett is also excited because I told him that if we were having a boy, I would like to just have 2 kids, but if we were having a girl, we could have more, like he wants (he wants 4). So he's excited that we will have more kids in the next few years. Hmmmm....not sure how thrilled I am about that, but we'll see. So anyways....

IT'S A GIRL!!!

Got me Thinking....

Ok, so my friend Lindsay that I went to Oak Hills with 8 years ago has been having a debate on her blog about homeschooling vs. christian schooling vs. public schooling. I of course had to be the devils advocate here and let everyone know my thoughts on public school. Now that the debate has become heated and has gone on for quite some time, it got me thinking more and more about what Brett and I will do once our kids become school-age.

I for one, loved my public schooling education. I had lots of friends at school, and also at church, most of whom went to a different school than me. I was in band, choir, nordic skiing, marching band, and drumline and had a blast with all of it. I went on numerous trips with school groups, to places like New York, Washington DC, Calgary Canada, Atlanta Georgia, and many more across the state. I never drank, smoke, had sex, or partied during high school. Many of my friends did, but I just wasn't interested. I grew up knowing that I never wanted to disappoint my parents, and I knew that by partying and acting stupid I would do that. So I hung out with my church friends a lot out of school. And with those friends I also did a lot of traveling. We had lots of sleepovers, church lock-ins and basically spent way too much time together. But I enjoyed it and still have many of the same friends I had in high school.

So of course, I want my kids to have the same great experience I did. Not to say there weren't bad times. Like the enormous fight I got into with my friend Stacey that caused us to not speak for 2 years. And the jealousy I felt towards my friends with boyfriends as I was always the single one. But mostly, I had a lot of fun. And I think I turned out just fine. I went through sex ed class, I had friends who drank and did drugs, I had friends who got pregnant during high school. But somehow I knew better. And I really think it has to do with how a person is raised.

I guess it just got me thinking that I had better be a good parent if I am willing to let my kids go to school for 7 hours a day, talking to whomever they want, hearing about god knows what and learning about god knows what. I see myself being a good parent and talking openly to my kids about things. I plan on having a relationship with my kids that allows them to talk to me about things they hear at school so that I can remind them of what we do and don't believe in. But I also hope my kids learn that people who practice a different religion than us aren't bad people. People who are gay or have gay parents aren't bad people. People who make mistakes and get pregnant as a teenager aren't bad people. Of course, I will tell them that we don't do those things, we live by the bible, which means we MUST LOVE all people no matter how different we are.

I plan to teach our kids how to be a light in a dark world. How to discern between what is Godly and what is Wordly. How to read a book like Harry Potter for the entertainment, without going out a practicing witchcraft. How to memorize scripture and pray to Jesus. How to love our neighbors even when we don't want to. How to find the resources to learn about different things we are interested in. How to make wise decisions about drinking and sex. That is what my parents did for me and I am so thankful for that! I am also thankful that they took the time to meet and get to know my friends parents and families. Both of my sisters and I lived our teen years knowing we could never get away with anything because our parents knew each other and knew where and what we were doing all the time. My parents never told us we couldn't be friends with certain people, but encouraged us to be friends with people the whole family knew. It was a lot of fun when all three of us had friends that were siblings, and our parents were also friends. It meant we got to spend a lot more time with them because the whole families could get together!

I've just been thinking so much about these things and hoping that when Ryann is old enough for school, I make the right decision. I have always been a supporter of the public school system and the referendums that are proposed, and the grants that are sought after. Maybe because I am a teacher, or maybe because my parents are that way and that is all I know. Either way, I would hate for the public school system to fall apart because there are so many kids out there that need it. I know that is no reason to send my own kids, its more of a reason for me to teach. But I still have faith in the public school system. Especially in MN where we can still take pride in our schools and teachers.

Anyways.....just wanted to get my jumbled thoughts out of my head and onto paper....or computer.....

A Day at the Park

This morning Brett and I took Ryann to the large wooden park up in Blackduck. Ryann LOVES climbing on things and we had to drag her away when it was time to go. I also took some picture of our lawn......when it rains this much and your mower is broken, your yard turns into something scary! Ryann calls it her garden....

No More Crabbies!

I have been doing so well lately with not getting crabby easily. But then the last few days I have been snapping at the littlest things! Ryann has been peeing (and pooping!!! disgusting!!!!) in her pants almost daily and I have no patience to clean nasty dirty undies and pants. I find myself snapping at her for that, along with anything she does that seems to take awhile. I am yelling at her to hurry up and groaning at how long things take, and I HATE that about myself! She's only 2, for pete's sake, and I act like shes this adult who is trying to irritate me. Where has my patience gone? I think I have been letting myself get stressed out about money and bills. Things are always so tight around here, and I don't know how to fix it! I get so anxious that we live from paycheck to paycheck because it leaves no room for emergencies. I also hate having to tell people we can't do something, or go somewhere because we can't afford it. The worst part is that Brett works his butt off to support us, and he rarely gets to spend any money on himself. He has no problem supporting the family while our kids are young, but sometimes it gets to him that he works 45-50 hours every week and never sees a penny of it. I try to find ways to get him money to put toward his cars, but it seems that every month we might have something extra, our car breaks down, or we need more propane, or we take a trip to the cities to see my family. I wish I could just relax and be thankful for what we have. At least we always have gas in our car, food on our table, and a warm home. Sometimes its easy to forget about that when I am feeling bad for myself that I can't go somewhere, or buy something new.
So thats my problem today. I really need to pray for patience with Ryann. She doesn't deserve to be yelled at or told to hurry up all day long. She's really a good kid and I have to work harder at appreciating that, instead of feeling aggravated throughout the day. Anyways.....just some jumbled thoughts from a tired mom.